dialogue with my cat

Me: I have no friends, no one to talk to. Emmitt, will you be my friend?
Emmitt: Of course.
Me: I'm a loner, I don't have any friends.
Emmitt: Don't be silly, you have lots of friends. What about Liz and Mary?
Me: They aren't here.
Emmitt: Well, you could have friends, but you tend to isolate yourself.
Me: It's true, you're right, Emmitt, when I feel lonely I cut myself off from the world. It's because I need to balance the fake interactions with real ones, so when I have no real interaction with people, I have no energy for the superficial conversations.
Emmitt: Stop making excuses.
Me: Okay. But my life is still over. I'm all alone.
Emmitt: You're never alone if you have Jesus.
Me: I don't know what to say to that. Stop messing with my head.
Emmitt: Don't get mad at me, I am your only friend, haha.
Me: I miss Toby, I wish I wasn't pissed, pissed at Daniel, and that there weren't piles of shit sitting around the house that I've rented, and I wish that my parents were here.
Emmitt: Well, Toby's dead, your parents are gone, your house is a shitbox, and you will always be pissed at Daniel.
Me: Well, thanks Emmitt, that's helpful.
Emmitt: Just trying to be honest.